The Rise of Paon
by Remasa
Summary: Gabriel Agreste regrets ever letting her talk him into this for so long. He regrets being too weak to resist his grief-fueled desires. He regrets being too much of a fool to see the trap closing in around him. But most of all, he would regret even more if he lost Adrien forever. Written for Day 7 – "Regret" for Gabriel Appreciation Week


_The Rise of Paon_

 _Day 7 - Regret_

 _Gabriel Agreste regrets ever letting her talk him into this for so long. He regrets being too weak to resist his grief-fueled desires. He regrets being too much of a fool to see the trap closing in around him. But most of all, he would regret even more if he lost Adrien forever. Written for Day 7 – "Regret" for Gabriel Appreciation Week._

Another day and another failed akuma. Hawkmoth sighed in resignation as he felt the last threads of the link between him and his akuma victim fade away. He couldn't even muster up enough energy to monologue a fearsome threatening rebuttal like he usually did. He released his transformation and just stood there for a moment in the dim light.

"Master?"

Nooroo's tentative voice pulled Gabriel from his musings.

"Do you ever wonder what could have happened if..." he gulped, hesitant to continue. The purple sprite waited patiently, if a bit confused. "If maybe I were to just give this all up?"

He refused to look at Nooroo, not wanting to see the kwami's reaction. The sudden hope that would inevitably blossom upon his little kwami's face would crush Gabriel even further. Disappointment was often the usual expression. Disappointment, and resignation. It seemed Nooroo mirrored his handler's moods more often than not.

"Not that I am arguing, but what brought this on?"

Ah, confusion. The third most common expression.

"I heard Adrien's voice. Just for a moment. But it resonated loud and clear through my akuma. He sounded... irate." Gabriel turned at last and faced his kwami. He leaned heavily against one of the steel beams, his body slumped with an ingrained weariness so deep it took the little sprite's breath away. "I don't understand," Gabriel said. "He didn't sound scared or worried or anything that anyone would really associate to feelings when facing an akuma. He just sounded angry that he had been interrupted. What was he doing, Nooroo?"

The kwami shook his head. "I don't know, Master."

"How long have I been attempting to bring my wife back? Months? Nearly a year? And this whole time, I'm no closer than when I first started." He sighed and raised a finger to stroke against the purple brooch on his shirt. "Maybe I should just... move on." He hung his head low.

To his surprise, he felt a feather-light tickle on his cheek. He jerked back with a start, raising his hand to instinctively swat at his face. Nooroo stared back at him, then flew back in and nuzzled his cheek. Gabriel closed his eyes.

"I think that's a very wise decision, Master."

* * *

"Excuse me?"

Nathalie stared at him with the closest thing to pure frustration that he had ever seen on her face.

He sighed and rubbed the bridge of his nose. "I'm giving up. No more Hawkmoth," he repeated.

"Why?"

Gabriel walked over to the portrait of his wife, casting one long forlorn look at it before running a finger across a picture of Adrien that rested upon his desk. "He's grown up so much. I hardly recognize the man he is today with the boy who cried on my shoulder when Yvette vanished."

"I don't think that's a good idea, sir."

He stopped his reminiscing and turned to her with a frown. "Why not?"

"Think of how happy Adrien will be when he sees his mother walking through that door. And _you_ were the one who brought her back. Your family will be whole again. He'll be happy."

Gabriel's hand trembled slightly. He turned back to the picture of Adrien beaming up at him.

"It's been too long since I've seen him smile like that," Nathalie added softly, staring at the photograph that consumed his attention. She walked over and placed a gentle hand upon his shoulder. "Go on," she said. "I'll tell Adrien you can't make it to dinner again. You have work to do."

He nodded and tore his eyes away from the photograph, heading towards his lair once again.

* * *

"You're disappointed." Gabriel didn't meet the forlorn eyes of his kwami. He didn't want to face the little being; didn't want to see the disappointment he knew was reflected in the sprite's luminous eyes. "I have to do this," Gabriel whispered. "I'm so close."

"You were so close to doing the right thing," Nooroo corrected, his voice free of judgment and only offering sympathy. Sympathy which Gabriel didn't deserve yet he allowed to caress his soul nonetheless. "You can still do the right thing."

"After all this time?"

"There's always time for a second chance."

A tear slid down his cheek. He didn't bother to wipe it away. "How much do you really believe that about me?"

"Every word."

"I'm beyond hope."

"No one is beyond hope. I'll be with you, Master."

Now the designer did glance over at his kwami. "After all I've done?"

Nooroo offered a smile. "A butterfly is about metamorphosis. Change. Even now, you're changing. Growing into someone better."

Gabriel snorted. "Was this your plan all along?"

"I don't have plans. The very nature of change makes it impossible. I just adapt. And grow. As you have."

"Let's go, Nooroo."

* * *

"You idiotic fool."

He wasn't sure if it was the actual words or the venom behind them that surprised him more. Either one would have been enough to question the sanity of his assistant, but together, they stunned him into a stupor.

Nathalie glared at him, stalking over to the portrait of his wife. With a derisive scoff, she slid open the painting and tapped a finger against the keypad.

That jolted him out of his trance. "What are you doing?" he snapped. "Get away from my safe."

"No, Gabriel," she replied, ignoring him. "I've put up with your ineptitude long enough." She reached in and snatched the blue peacock pin before turning back to him. He almost winced at the cold hatred emanating from her. "Your time has ended."

"What are you talking about?"

"All you had to do was get the two Miraculouses from _children_ ," she hissed the last word out, "and you couldn't even do that. You had quite literally one job because I took care of your little fashion project and you failed at that. You're the most pathetic person I've ever met."

"How dare you," Gabriel began in a low voice, his eyes flashing in anger.

She interrupted with a snort of laughter. "How dare I? I should have done this a long time ago. You were always the stupidly oblivious one with your head in the clouds and visions of a future that you had no hope of securing."

His anger dissolved into bewilderment. "What do you mean?" he asked, blinking at the declaration.

"Did you really think I would have allowed you to use the two most powerful Miraculouses for something as embarrassingly pathetic as a wish to bring your wife back? When you could have had all that power?"

"What good is all that power without her by my side," Gabriel retorted as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. "You agreed to help me bring her back."

"I would have told you anything you wanted to hear. You were always so easy to manipulate, so driven in your singular goal that you ignored everything and everyone around you. Like Adrien. Poor child doesn't even know his own father anymore."

Gabriel's heart clenched at the mention of Adrien. "I'm doing this for him," he insisted.

"You're doing this for yourself," Nathalie shot back. "You don't know the first thing about Adrien because you've been wallowing in selfish self-pity for months."

The blow stung and Gabriel flinched at the words.

"But I fear you'll never actually succeed," Nathalie continued, fixing the brooch onto her jacket. "That's why I'm taking matters into my own hands."

"Was this your plan the whole time?"

She spared him a sniff and a roll of her eyes. "Of course it was. I had just figured you would have actually accomplished something by now. As if I was going to let you waste such power. But you're still going to get those Miraculouses for me," she added. "Why should I get my hands dirty when I already have the perfect scapegoat right here?"

"You're a bigger fool than I am if you think I will ever help you," Gabriel snarled.

"Oh? I'm afraid I have quite the plethora of evidence collected about your indiscretions against this city."

"It'll be your word against mine. Paris would never believe you," he said, clinging to a desperate argument.

"There's only one person I need to convince to destroy your world."

Gabriel blanched. The cold sneer on her lips reflected the steel in her voice. He gulped. His tongue swiped over his lips, attempting to bring a bit of moisture to them. "Y-you would do that to Adrien?"

"Of course I would, Gabriel," she replied. "Oh, don't act so surprised. He's always been a means to an end for me. You of all people taught me that. He's _your_ son, not mine."

The nonchalance with which she dismissed Adrien further confirmed the fact that she wasn't bluffing. He had hired her for her ability to remain impartial against emotions – but he never once thought it would backfire against him.

Hubris. Truly, that was his downfall.

He refused to let Adrien pay the price. He felt Nooroo shift inside his pocket.

Nathalie walked over to the portrait. "Where is Adrien now, I do wonder?" she placed a delicate nail upon her lips. "Ah, probably out with his friends. It would be a shame if something were to happen to him. After all, Paris is simply bombarded with random attacks."

"You wouldn't dare," he snarled.

"Not yet," she assured him. "But I think a demonstration of what exactly I _am_ capable of is in order." She turned and strolled out of the room. Gabriel followed, panic rising inside him as she led a steady path toward Adrien's school.

"What are you going to do?" he gasped as he caught up with her. She eyed the buildings surrounding the school and smiled, her lips curling into a cruel grin that sent a shiver of fear through him.

"Watch and see, Gabriel," she taunted in a light tone. She pointed to a group of teenagers milling around out front. Two girls stood off to one side, a brown-haired girl with glasses and a dark-haired pigtailed girl with a pink purse. They giggled at something together. Nathalie headed down a dark alley offshoot. Gabriel trailed behind her. He heard her mumble something under her breath, and with a bright flash of blue, she transformed. Paon peeked around the corner. "Ah, this is going to be good," she giggled. She snapped her fan in the direction of the two girls. Several feathers shot out and sailed over to the two girls – they had parted ways now, and the pigtailed girl started across the street. The street that led her directly in front of the building Paon shot.

Paon sent him a smirk. "Aww, she has no idea what's going to happen," she cooed, her voice silky and unnerving. He looked over at the building. "Someone might want to warn her she's about to be... crushed."

Gabriel shot out of the alley before the last word barely passed her lips. As he sprinted toward the girl, he heard Paon snap her fingers. The feathers embedded into the walls of the building exploded.

His lungs burned as he raced across the sidewalk. The explosion deafened the girl, who ducked on instinct and covered her head with her arms to shield herself from the debris.

"Move!" he roared. "Get away!"

The girl didn't acknowledge him. She slowly turned her head to stare up at the building with a kind of deer-in-headlights horror, watching her impending doom with wide eyes.

The building crumbled around her.

He wasn't going to make it.

But he'll be damned if he wasn't going to try.

Pouring his last bit of adrenaline into the final sprint, he crashed into the girl, wrapping his arms around her as his energy catapulted them both away from the destruction. They slammed to the ground, rolling several times until the momentum slowed enough for Gabriel to glance over at the building. He gulped, spotting heaps of rubble where the girl had been standing mere seconds earlier. Rage coursed through him. He pushed himself to his feet, determined to confront Nathalie and forgetting about the girl he had just saved until she released a small whimper of pain.

He turned his focus back on her. "Where are you hurt?" he demanded.

She was biting her lip in a grimace and clutching her shoulder.

"Marinette!"

The hysterical cry distracted him. The glasses-clad companion to the girl bolted over, throwing her arms around the pig-tailed girl still sitting on the sidewalk. She sobbed as she clutched her friend. "I thought you were dead."

"Me, too," the girl – Marinette – replied in a whisper. "I'm okay, Alya, really," she insisted.

"You're hurt," Gabriel repeated, redirecting their attentions back to him.

"Mr. Agreste," Marinette gasped. "What..."

Before she could form the rest of her question, he heard someone else shout his name.

"Mr. Agreste!"

And the rage returned, boiling up inside him. He clenched his fists and turned to the newcomer, glaring at her with all the hate he could muster. She didn't bat an eye. "Are you okay?" she asked, rushing over to them, her face schooled into the perfect mask of required concern. "That was really close. You could have died."

Gabriel wasn't sure he could form a coherent sentence, but for the sake of the gathering crowd forming around him, he grit his teeth and ground out, "We're fine, thank you for your concern, Nathalie."

She feigned a gasp as she looked to Marinette, still sitting on the ground with Alya hovering over her. "Oh, but you're hurt." Gabriel turned back to the two girls as Nathalie stepped forward. "You should come with us, we'll get you to a doctor."

Marinette looked up right as a spike of fear shot through Gabriel. Get her alone so that Nathalie could finish the job? Never. The girl must have detected something in his face because her brow creased. He fought to keep his expression neutral.

"Uhm, that's okay, thank you," she replied. "I'll be okay. Thank you for saving my life, Mr. Agreste."

He couldn't even manage a wan smile. Settling on a stiff nod, his heartbeat still thudding intensely at the close call, he turned and started off down the sidewalk. Nathalie trailed behind him.

"You've made your point," he snarled once they were well out of earshot.

"I'm glad," came the demure reply. "I thought I would have to really drive the point home with you. You tend to be so stubborn sometimes. Though I must commend you on your superb reflexes. I didn't think you would make it in time."

He stopped and whirled around to face her. "You really are heartless, aren't you?"

She smirked. "I thought that was a requirement to work for you, Mr. Agreste." Without another glance at him, she sauntered past, leaving him reeling in her wake.

* * *

"Nooroo? I don't think I can do this alone."

"You won't be alone, Master, I'll be with you."

"I... Nooroo, I was never worthy to wield your power. Call me Gabriel."

"What are you planning to do, Gabriel?"

"The only thing I can do."

* * *

The buzzing of her phone distracted Alya from the latest blog posting. With a sigh, she reached over to check the caller ID, puzzled to find an unknown number.

"Hello?"

"May I speak with Alya Cesaire."

"Speaking. Who is this?" She tilted her head to prop the phone between her ear and shoulder and tapped a few times on her keyboard.

"This is Gabriel Agreste."

Her hands froze. A beat, then, "Mr. Agreste, why are you calling me?"

"I need to speak with Ladybug and Chat Noir. Privately. No one else can know."

Alya frowned. "Is this about what happened earlier this week? The building that almost killed Marinette." At the sound of her friends name, she heard a sharp inhale. Score. "It is! What do you know about that?"

"It's dangerous, please don't ask any more questions. I need to speak with Ladybug and Chat Noir, and I know you have the resources to contact them."

Alya sighed, knowing she wouldn't really get more information out of the secretive man. "Fine. I'll pass them a message."

"Thank you."

* * *

Gabriel paced around the tiny apartment his company rented exclusively for visiting models. Nathalie was off on some errand, successfully leaving him to his devices – believing her threats against Adrien were sufficient enough to leave him unattended.

"Gabriel?" Nooroo's soft voice snapped him out of his worried trek. "I'll be here for you."

Gabriel closed his eyes and allowed a soft smile to form on his face. "Oh, little Nooroo, haven't you figured it out yet? I'm releasing you today."

The violet kwami fluttered up, ruffling Gabriel's hair. "Hey!" he protested, reaching up to swat the sprite away. Nooroo giggled.

"That's better," he said. Gabriel flattened his brow and leveled a look at him as he reached up and finger-combed his hair back into place.

"What was that for?" he snapped.

"To distract you."

Gabriel rolled his eyes. "Well, it worked."

"Good. They're here."

Gabriel gasped and pivoted around to the window as Nooroo flew inside his jacket. The two heroes landed just outside on the balcony and Gabriel rushed to open the door for them. His hands shook as he locked the door behind them and pulled the curtains shut.

"Good afternoon, Mr. Agreste," Ladybug greeted with a polite smile. Beside her, Chat merely nodded his greeting with a cautious expression on his face. Gabriel couldn't blame the young hero. He had been very cryptic.

"Good afternoon, Ladybug, Chat Noir," he said, inclining his head to each hero in turn.

He led them to the main sitting area, where he took the overstuffed chair and the two heroes perched upon the sofa. "Alya said this was about the building explosion the other day that almost killed Marinette?" Ladybug began.

At this, Chat looked over at his partner with a gasp. "Marinette was almost killed? When? What happened?"

"Relax, Chat, she's fine. A bit shaken, but otherwise safe." Ladybug turned to him. "Thanks to Mr. Agreste here. He saved her life."

Gabriel winced at that. Her life wouldn't have even _been_ in danger if it wasn't because of him.

"Is that so?" Chat focused his intense gaze upon him, and the designer couldn't help but feel slightly unnerved. He folded his hands in front of his chin.

"I'm curious, though, do you know why she was attacked?" Ladybug asked, and for the briefest of moments, Gabriel thought he heard her falter. A slight tremble to her words.

He gulped, then nodded. "To prove a point."

"What point?"

"Why her?"

Ladybug and Chat spoke simultaneously. Gabriel pinched the bridge of his nose. "I... it didn't matter who it was," he said, waving a hand dismissively, "anyone nearby would have done. The point was that they could..." he gulped, steeling himself, "they could attack at any time."

Both heroes frowned at him. "Mr. Agreste," Ladybug said, "I think you need to tell us the entire story."

He nodded. "Yes. But first, I want your word that no matter what happens to me, or you decide what happens to me, you protect my son."

The heroes exchanged a baffled look between them. "Adrien?" Ladybug asked. "Why?"

"From whom?" Chat added.

Gabriel squared his shoulders and fixed each hero with his unwavering stare. "Promise me, you'll both protect him."

"We promise," Ladybug hastily assured him, and he sagged. He hadn't realized how desperate he was for that promise.

"Protect him from whom?" Chat repeated.

Gabriel stood and went over to the mini-fridge, pulling out a bottle of water and taking a long drink from it. Nooroo stirred inside his jacket and he took comfort in the small kwami's presence. He recapped the water and walked back over to the two heroes, both watching him expectantly.

"From my assistant."

They blinked.

"Nathalie?" they both blurted out, then looked at each other in confusion.

The elder man clasped his hands behind his back to steady his nerves. He nodded. "She..." his legs wobbled and he realized he couldn't do this standing, no matter how much he wanted to. He collapsed back into his chair. "I should probably start at the beginning," he said.

"That might be best, Mr. Agreste. Take your time." Gabriel idly wondered if Ladybug would be as compassionate toward him at the end of his story.

He took a deep breath. "A little over a year ago, my wife vanished. I don't know how, or why, or where... one minute she was here... the next, gone." He gulped. "I was... inconsolable. I tried everything; did everything I could to find her. What I did next is inexcusable. Unforgivable. I..." he hesitated, his mouth drying at the words on his lips. Nooroo nuzzled against his chest. He inhaled, squared his shoulders, and forced out his next words. "I am Hawkmoth."

He expected the heroes to jump up and attack him. He expected them to react with shock and fear. He expected them to scream and yell at him and rescind their offer of assistance.

What he didn't expect was for Ladybug to sit back and fold her arms with a silent frown.

He didn't expect Chat, normally the jovial and nonchalant member of the duo, to blanch and push against the coffee table, in an attempt to scramble away. He stared at Gabriel with wide eyes.

"I never wanted to hurt anyone," Gabriel said, his voice whisper soft. "My goal, as I believe you've figured out by now, was to combine your Miraculouses and wish my wife back to me."

"What changed?" Ladybug asked, calm and collected.

"I did, I think," Gabriel replied. "And maybe my son?" Chat snorted in disbelief, drawing the attention of the other two. He glared at the table, not meeting their eyes. Gabriel cast him another searching look before returning to his story. "About six months ago, I started to realize that not only was my goal possibly unobtainable, but I realized that Adrien was no longer on my radar. I didn't know him anymore. I didn't know what he was doing. I didn't know how he was handling his change of schooling. I realized this one afternoon when I was riding to the office, and I looked out the window and spotted him in the park with his friends. He was laughing."

Gabriel closed his eyes as the flood of memories consumed him. "He was happy. After months of mourning the loss of his mother, he had managed to succeed where I had failed. He had found a way to be happy again." A tear trailed out from behind his closed eyes and trickled down his face. He tilted his head upward, eyes still closed, as if the sun could penetrate the stone walls and shine down upon him.

Nooroo took the opportunity to fly out of his jacket, surprising the two heroes. They gasped as the new kwami fluttered beside Gabriel. He reached one hand up to cup the kwami against his cheek. "In that moment, I realized that Adrien had discovered happiness once again – without me in his life. Somehow I had slipped past and he continued on, leaving me with my own darkness. And at the same time, a sense of loss and longing stronger than before surrounded me. I wanted to try to become part of his life again. To be involved with what he's doing. To watch my boy grow up."

"So why didn't you stop then?" Chat asked, his voice thick with emotion. "Why didn't you try to be part of your son's life then?"

Gabriel opened his own eyes, mildly surprised at the feline hero's reaction. Beside him, Ladybug blinked away her own tears. "Because I was a fool." He looked over to Nooroo, gently stroking the top of the kwami's head with one finger. "I was a fool who didn't understand the vast power in my own hands – the corrupting power I held. Each time I broached the topic to my assistant, she reminded me of the sad days when Adrien cried himself to sleep in his room when he didn't think anyone was listening. She encouraged me to imagine his face when his mother finally would walk through those doors after so long. Every time I thought I could escape my grief and begin to heal, Nathalie was there to lure me back into the darkness with fanciable potential. It took me six months to finally resist completely."

"And then what happened?" Ladybug prompted quietly. Beside her, Chat clutched one hand over his mouth. His skin had turned a faint tinge of green and his face was covered in a thin sheen of sweat.

"Are you going to be sick?" Gabriel asked, a bit concerned for the boy.

"Maybe," Chat whispered. Gabriel stood, swiftly walking over to the kitchen to grab a trashcan and a bottle of water. He stuffed the trashcan in front of Chat and set the bottle on the table. The teenaged hero bent over the trashcan.

"Breathe, deep and slow," Gabriel ordered. Beside him, Ladybug rubbed one hand in soothing circles across his back. After a few steadying breaths, Chat looked up at Gabriel.

"I think I'll be okay now," he said.

Gabriel nodded and sat back down on the opposite chair, cognizant of the hero's wariness still. "What happened was that Nathalie was tired of tiptoeing around. She stole the Peacock Miraculous that was in my safe. She planned this whole time to snatch your two Miraculouses and use them to further her own gain. Which, she coldly informed me, did _not_ include bringing my wife back. And worse, she still planned on using me to achieve that goal by doing her dirty work."

"And that's when she threatened Adrien?" Ladybug asked.

"Yes," he whispered. "Initially with threats to tell him of my true identity and shatter any remaining hope of reconciliation, and then with direct physical threats on his life."

"And Marinette?" Chat asked, his voice wavering yet clear. "How does she fit into this?"

"Truthfully, it could have been anyone," Gabriel said. "Nathalie was determined to demonstrate the extent of her resolve, and selected one of the students in front of Adrien's school at random. She happened to be the unlucky... chosen. I... I almost didn't make it in time." Gabriel buried his head in his hands. "All that to prove to me that she could reach Adrien at any moment. And not just Adrien. She's willing to kill his friends to break him. First, his friends, then revealing my identity to him, and then finally, most likely she would have..." he gulped, too afraid to finish that thought.

"That's horrible," Ladybug said softly. "Why would she do that? Doesn't she care about Adrien at all?"

"No," Gabriel replied with a half-hysterical bubble of laughter. "She told me she would enjoy watching my pain as he's broken."

Chat's face darkened even as Ladybug gasped in disbelief.

"Please," Gabriel begged, "take my Miraculous and give it to someone who can make good use of it. Someone more deserving of it than I."

"No, Gabriel," Nooroo cried, his voice tiny and distraught.

The designer held up one hand with a sad smile. "Don't pretend, Nooroo," he said. "We both know that I never deserved a wonderful companion like you. You'll do much better with someone who has a pure heart, not a broken-hearted selfish fool like myself."

Nooroo swept in and clung to the top of Gabriel's hair. "But I don't want to leave you," he sobbed, and Gabriel could feel the tears of his kwami leaking onto his hair. He rolled his eyes upward in an attempt to glimpse the purple being.

"I'm sorry, Nooroo, but that's not my choice," Gabriel replied. "I must accept the consequences of my actions." He lowered his gaze to fix upon the two heroes. "And I do accept those consequences," he said. "Whatever they may be. Whatever you decide to do. Just, please... protect my son."

Ladybug stood. "We'll protect your son, of course," she declared. "And we'll discuss those consequences you keep going on about after we neutralize this new threat. I think I know someone we can talk to. I have a plan." She grinned. "How do you feel about becoming a double agent, Mr. Agreste?"

* * *

 _ **Author's Note:** This was a bit of a last minute prompt as I had to shuffle a few things around. I totally have this headcanon where Nathalie is the mastermind behind everything and she's prodding and poking and further manipulating Gabriel in his grief to continue to be Hawkmoth. Whenever he starts to falter, she's there whispering poisoned words into his ear to get him to continue. He at least has a reason for doing what he's doing. What's her excuse?_

 _I still want to do a humorous "regret" prompt! I'll probably post it next week. I simply ran out of time!_

 _A special thank you to PerditaAlottachocolate for beta reading this and declaring it angst and not drama._


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